Whom should I hold responsible for the big dog’s turd below my window? Certainly not my neighbour: he will readily wash his hands in innocence, for he walks blocks away from his and my house to satisfy his dog’s physical needs.
What is implied is that the culprit of the turd must be sought two blocks away from my house. Since it is unclear in which direction the responsible dog owner is to be found, that leaves only, what, fifty or so households? Great.
Well, this is my solution to the cowardness inherent in the average dog owner. In the name of all those who live two blocks away from our house, I hold my neighbour responsible for any and all turds in my close vicinity.
Beware! I am hungry.
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